


Home

by Niki



Series: Payback [3]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cats, Headaches & Migraines, Home, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-16
Updated: 2013-04-16
Packaged: 2017-12-08 16:18:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/763430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niki/pseuds/Niki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>It feels good to still be his hero, to protect him in all the small ways, even if it's only holding him through a migraine.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home

Shepard is sitting on the sofa, lazily petting Bullet when he hears the key in the lock.

“You're early,” he says, removing the cat from his lap and getting up.

One look at Kaidan explains his early arrival. The tension around his eyes is as clear a sign to Shepard as the slight tremor in his hands. He limps to where Kaidan is trying to unbutton his coat, and silently takes over the task. Kaidan closes his eyes, relaxing infinitesimally.

“Bad?” Shepard asks quietly. About once a month Kaidan comes home with a migraine, aggravated by the bright lights at the bank, sometimes triggered by difficult customers or stressful workdays, sometimes by seemingly nothing.

“Bad enough.” Of course it is, if he didn't soldier on but had to leave work early.

Shepard helps him sit down so that he can remove his shoes, then leads him to the bedroom, flicking off lights as they go, then helps him remove the suit and climb into the bed before retrieving his pills and a glass of water. 

“Stay?” Kaidan asks, eyes closed, after swallowing the pills, and Shepard climbs into the bed to lie next to him, not quite touching, because sometimes when he hurts Kaidan can't stand even a lightest touch. 

This time, though, he moves until he is glued to Shepard's side, and what can he do but cuddle him closer, letting him hide his face against his neck, and hold him until the tremors stop and his breathing evens out when the pill lulls him to sleep.

Bullet joins them, curling down on other side of Kaidan, and Shepard looks at his family and smiles. While he wouldn't wish for his man to suffer even the slightest discomfort, he can't deny that it feels good to still be his hero, to protect him in all the small ways, even if it's only holding him through a migraine.

\- - -

He must fall asleep himself, because he wakes up. He realises he was dreaming only when he opens his eyes and the blood soaked sand transforms into their bedroom. He's still holding Kaidan but the other man is awake, judging from his breathing.

“You okay?” he asks, quietly, in case he's still sensitive to sound.

“I'm fine,” Kaidan says, and he does sound it. 

Good, it was one of the shorter attacks, then. Shepard concentrates on keeping his own breathing even, even though he can still see the blood in his mind, feel the heat of the sand, and hear the silence of the people who are no longer around.

“Nightmare?” Kaidan asks, anyway, and Shepard never knows what gives him away.

“Yeah,” he admits, because lying to this man is something he doesn't want to learn. There are already so many things he can't tell him...

“I know most of what you did is still classified,” Kaidan says, and when did he start reading minds? “But... if you want to talk...”

“I know.” He doesn't, he doesn't want to taint their bedroom, their home, with all that blood and failure. 

And Kaidan seems to know that, too, because he turns until he is holding Shepard in his arms, and Shepard is the one hiding his face against a warm neck, finding solace in a steady pulse. 

“I love you,” he whispers, because he needs to say the words, needs to make sure the other man knows how much he means to him, every day.

“I love you, too.” He never tires of hearing the words back. 

They hold each other for a long time, blurring the lines of the protector and the protected, saving each other, as always. Bullet abandons them at some point in favour of chasing his toys in the living room, but even that is good, a reminder of life outside the room, a tangible proof of the family he has these days. 

Shepard wants to say something profound, something that could sum up his feelings, the contentment he feels in his life, their lives, these days, but he was never a man of words, he's always been a man of action.

So he acts. 

“Marry me?”


End file.
